I couldn't decide how I wanted to title this post...in keeping with my battle theme from the first two, I thought 'white flag' was appropriate, but then it also sounded like I was giving up, when in reality I was very much victorious. So then I thought, 'new orders' because even though I won, I'm also moving on. So I went with both. Sort of. Anyway...
My last post talked about the drama I had going on at work, in particular with my boss, and about how God had asked me to trust him and I wasn't sure at the time what that meant exactly. Ready to find out? :)
After my boss refused to talk things through with me (in fact, refused to talk to me at all), I went back to my assistant director and talked to her. I had several options, all of which would only lead to more drama, more stress, and no real solution.
So we prayed. She prayed. I prayed. My husband, family, close friends...all of us prayed. And then God spoke so clearly it was almost audible (at least for me): 'TRUST ME'. Only this time, He also said,' LEAVE'. And by leave, I mean my job. So, I turned in my two weeks notice and as of December 22, I am no longer employed.
I have to admit, leaving without knowing what I was stepping into was pretty scary for me. I am a planner. I like plans. Especially ones with a beginning, middle, and end. And me seeing all of those things from the beginning.
As God asked me to leave the library I remember saying to Him, 'Ok, but..uh...what's next?' I had been turning in resumes and applications at every opportunity I had seen for two months. I hadn't had one call back. As I asked, Holy Spirit spoke up. He said, 'Courtney, do you trust the Lord?' 'Well, yeah, 'I answered. 'Then have faith.'
Have faith? Uh oh. God rarely utters those two words without crazy stuff happening afterword. Just look at what happened to Abraham (became the father of a nation) or Moses (became the leader of a nation) or Mary (became mother to the Messiah!!). CRAZY STUFF.
Now, my case isn't that extreme, but at the time I didn't know that. Ha ha. So I ran to my hubby and closest prayer warriors and asked them to PRAY. I mean, REALLY PRAY. :) And they did.
Hubby and I both prayed specifically that God would give us a clearer picture of what He meant when He said, "Trust Me and have faith". Boy, did He answer. It may not have been a call to lead a nation...but it was pretty life changing.
'What?! What did He answer?!', you ask? He asked me to quit my job. Then He asked me to trust Him. Then He asked me to have faith. Then He asked me to give Him my time. All of it. He asked me to enter into full-time ministry. And He asked me to trust that He would provide for my family financially, because the ministry He wanted me to be a part of full-time can't pay me unless I raise my own support.
Yeah. I'm pretty blown away too.
So, I put on my big girl panties and said,'OK, Lord.'
I enlisted friends to pray. I drew up a "business plan" for the founder of the ministry to look at and waited. That turned into such an enthusiastic response, I can't even do it justice here, ha ha. Let's just say that God gave me a HUGE vision for my future in I.D. Ministries and Courtney Belle was VERY excited.
So that led to making contact through another I.D. person with someone who could help me figure out how to make this happen financially. And that turned into getting my first guaranteed donor towards my first paycheck. And an invaluable resource and 'mentor' so to speak!!
I'm still not 100% sure how everything will work or when it will all be nailed down. And even if I don't make a dime, I will be devoting my time and attention to the calling God has placed on me. I can't wait!
I am PUMPED UP right now. God is so good. And I can't wait to see where else these new orders will lead me.
"For I know the plans I have for you,"declares the Lord,"Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
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